


Song and Dance

by Cyan (vehicroids)



Category: South Park
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Basically they're dumbasses, Drinking, Karaoke, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-08-02 17:03:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16309205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vehicroids/pseuds/Cyan
Summary: Stan was bored of watching Eric and Kyle argue. Thankfully, Kenny was just as bored of it as he was.(Written for Stenny Week on Tumblr)





	Song and Dance

Stan didn't know why he agreed to go to a bar. He was a recovering alcoholic - not that any of them knew - so he could only drink alcohol free beer. It tasted like piss water, but at least it looked like he was drinking. Everyone else was getting tipsy, and Stan felt like he was missing out.

Going out with the guys had become nearly unbearable. Kyle and Eric were still doing that thing where they pretended not to be into each other, getting into arguments where they would be mere inches from each other. Stan had come close to telling them to just fuck already, but he didn't. It was entertaining at first, but now it was just tedious.

This left Stan and Kenny to act as training wheels on a bike: almost useless, and one wouldn't notice if they were gone. Stan almost wished he had gone for alcoholic beer, as that would have at least injected some kind of life into this evening. Wait, no, that wasn't the way to think. He sipped his piss water, rolling his eyes as those two kicked up another fight.

“Stan!” Kenny said, smiling. “I'm bored.”

Stan snorted. “Me too."

“I give it another week,” Kenny said, looking over at Eric and Kyle.

He had been saying that for years, and still nothing happened. Stan caught himself hoping they would fuck and get it over with again and grimaced. He needed to get laid, if that was his focus.

“We could just go, and they wouldn't notice,” Stan said.

“Then let's go!” Kenny said. “They're doing karaoke in a bar a couple of blocks away.”

Absolutely not. Stan didn't sing in public anymore, and he definitely didn't do karaoke. Had he ever done karaoke? Not that he could think of, and that only made him want to do it less.

“Don't frown like that. It'll be fun, I promise,” Kenny said.

Who was Stan to distrust Kenny? At least when he said it would be fun, it was guaranteed to be genuinely fun. It wasn't an Eric plan that ended poorly or anything.

“Okay, come on,” Stan said, standing up. “Bet you $10 they won't notice we're gone for like, an hour.”

“Pshh, you're on. They won't notice until the morning,” Kenny laughed.

They left the bar, and Stan followed Kenny to the next bar. Stan could hear the loud music from outside the new bar, accompanied by people poorly wailing on the microphone. He looked at Kenny with a frown, but he seemed undeterred. Stan hated this already.

They went in, and this place was far busier than the last. Kenny grabbed Stan's hand to keep him nearby and dragged him over to the DJ. The queue wasn't that long, thankfully. Kenny turned to Stan.

“Solo or duet?”

“Uh… duet?”

Stan figured that, if they did it together, it would be over sooner rather than later. Kenny flipped through the pages and picked a song, but Stan didn't know what it was. Any attempt to find out was shot down. Stan groaned. Why did Kenny have to be a pain about this?

Finally, it was their turn. Maybe this meant Stan would be going home soon - he had no idea why he even agreed to this. He was handed a microphone and stood on the makeshift stage with Kenny, who looked far too pleased with himself. Stan didn't trust that smile.

When the first note of _We're Breaking Free_ hit, Stan wanted to die on the spot. High School Musical. Kenny was fucking with him. The joke was on him - Stan knew the lyrics off by heart. If that was how Kenny was going to be, then Stan would have to show off.

Kenny grabbed his waist and pulled him close while they sang, and Stan couldn't help but feel like this was the gayest thing he had ever done. He would have been lying if he said he wasn't having the time of his life, however. He wrapped an arm around Kenny and leaned back, striking a dramatic pose with him.

Kenny dropped his microphone and leaned closer, pulling Stan's leg up and leaning him back further. His hand held the small of Stan's back as he sang into his microphone. Stan had stopped singing, blinded by the light overhead that shined on Kenny like a halo. Oh God, he was a living angel.

The song ended, and Stan was convinced Kenny was going to kiss him as a grand finale: at least, that was what Stan was hoping for. But Kenny didn't. Instead, he stood Stan up straight and picked up the microphone like nothing had happened. Stan was left standing there, lost, until someone asked him for the microphone. He handed it over, and they commented on the fact it was warm and clammy from Stan's hand. He didn't care.

Stan needed air. He was going to faint or be sick, he couldn't tell which. As soon as he stepped outside, the rush of air got the best of him. The contents of his stomach rose up his throat and spilled out onto the pavement. He hadn't puked over a crush since he was _eight_ \- he was twenty-two, for God's sake. Wait, did he just refer to Kenny as a crush? Oh no.

Kenny was out and proud - it was no secret. Kyle and Eric were more reserved with their sexualities, but neither of them were straight, either. Stan thought he was the token straight friend until now. No, he still was, he was just confused, right? He shouldn't be having an identity crisis while dry heaving outside a bar, but he was doing it anyway. He wanted to go home and die in that moment.

He heard someone come up behind him, but Stan didn't react. He knew he was a sorry state, and his dignity was flushed in the toilet. A gentle hand touched the small of his back.

“I thought you bailed on me,” Kenny said, laughing a little. “Someone said they saw you running outside. What happened?”

Was there a no homo way of explaining he suddenly had feelings for Kenny? No. Even in the _yes homo_ way, it wasn't acceptable to say it. There were some lines best friends did not cross, and this was one of them. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand - great, now all he could taste was partially digested piss water.

“I dunno,” he mumbled - his voice was scratchy as he spoke. “Claustrophobic?”

“That's a new one. You've never been claustrophobic before,” Kenny said.

It felt like he could see through every lie. Stan's head was pounding and he felt weak from throwing up. His hand was pressed against a lamp post, and he realised he had a spotlight. The metal was cool and it felt nice, but that was the only good thing.

“Did I freak you out? Sorry, I know you're not… I thought it'd be funny. You never minded before, so I…” Kenny shook his head. “No excuses. I'm sorry.”

Stan looked over his shoulder at him. “I dunno what it was, dude. I think it was staring too long into the light, or singing in public. I didn't know I'd developed stage fright.”

Stan laughed weakly, but Kenny frowned. He wasn't buying it. Stan sighed, raking his fingers through his hair.

“I just realised something about me I shouldn't have. It's not you, dude.”

Not fully Kenny, though he was part of it. He shouldn't have said even that much. Kenny was quiet, like he was trying to figure out what Stan was trying to say, but Stan hoped Kenny wouldn't figure it out. Or maybe he hoped he would if he was down. His head was swimming with too many confusing thoughts.

“Alright, Stanley, I'll take you home,” Kenny said.

The evening was a bust thanks to Stan and his explosive digestive system and his gay crisis. He pulled himself away from the lamp post, and Kenny led him home by the small of his back. The four of them were renting a place together, so it wasn't as if Kenny would be walking him very far.

Stan wanted to lean into the embrace more than anything, but instead, he slinked his arm around Kenny's waist. Kenny sighed, pulling Stan closer.

“I'm sorry,” Stan mumbled, “I ruined tonight.”

“My options are dragging your sorry ass home or hanging out with the two-man debate club. I think I know what I like more,” Kenny said, laughing.

Stan couldn't tell what was worse. At least Eric and Kyle weren't puking, but Stan suspected he would have puked if he spent any more time with them. He leaned against Kenny, and thankfully, he didn't say anything.

“You gonna go back out?” Stan asked.

“Alone? No way, that's just sad. Besides, I've gotta look after you.”

“I'm fine, dude. I think I just ate something bad,” he mumbled.

“Don't let Cartman catch you saying his cooking is bad.”

Stan laughed - he wasn't scared of Eric. He was athletic, he could outrun Eric if he even tried anything. Kenny rubbed his side absentmindedly.

“You're not okay when you're leaning this heavily on me.”

Called out. That wasn't why Stan was leaning on Kenny, though. He was warm, and soft in the right places. There was something so comfortable about him - that was called a _crush_ , Stanley. He was so fucking useless.

They got back to their place, and Stan immediately flopped down on the couch. Kenny went to the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water. When he came back, he placed it on the coffee table before sitting on Stan's legs.

“There's another couch,” Stan said.

“There sure is,” Kenny hummed.

He rolled his eyes, but he smiled at Kenny. He turned the TV on and put on some background show. Stan wiggled and pulled his phone out of his pocket - nothing from Eric or Kyle yet, which shouldn't have surprised him.

He looked at the TV, but didn't take anything in. He didn't know what was on, but it didn't matter. Stan folded his hands over his chest.

“Can I ask you a personal question?” Stan asked.

“Personal, huh? What, you want my dick size? I'm--"

Stan felt his face burn. “No! Dude, no. What made you realise you liked guys?”

“You wanna talk to me about this instead of your super best friend?” Kenny asked.

Stan shook his head. If he tried to ask Kyle, he would have written an essay about what it was like to be gay. As much as he loved his best friend, Stan needed clear and concise, not long and rambling. Not right now. Kenny shifted on Stan's legs.

“I just knew. That's a shitty way of explaining it, but it's true. When you look at a guy and think, shit, I want him to kiss me? You're not straight,” Kenny said.

Stan looked at Kenny - that was exactly what he thought when they were singing, and exactly what he thought now. Ugh, okay, play it cool, Stan. Even if he wanted a kiss, he couldn't kiss him when he was supposed to be sick.

“What if…” Don't make it obvious. “What do you do if you like one of your best friends?”

“Ah. So that's why you're not talking to Kyle,” Kenny laughed. “I won't tell him.”

“It's not…” Wait, this meant he was totally getting away with it. Stan stopped.

“If I knew how to deal with that, I'd tell you. But I'm in the same boat,” Kenny said.

 _Maybe he means me_ , Stan's hopeful brain suggested. But why would it have been Stan? Kenny probably liked Kyle or Butters something, which would have sucked for Stan.

“I know girls, dude. At least I get what to do with girls. But I don't know what to do,” Stan sighed, staring up at the ceiling.

“I'd tell you to be honest with him, but I'm pretty sure he's too interested in Cartman,” Kenny shrugged.

Stan groaned. He wiggled his legs free before sitting up and standing up. He faced Kenny, though Stan didn't look at him.

“It's not Kyle. Or Cartman.”

He turned on his heel and went to the bathroom to finally brush his teeth. The taste of mint was better than the taste of vomit. The bathroom door opened behind him, and he saw Kenny in the mirror. Kenny had a small, nervous smile on his face.

“You know how I said I was in the same boat?” Kenny said. “I also didn't mean with those two. I meant I liked you.”

Stan choked on his toothpaste. He dropped the brush and spat out the paste, before wiping his mouth. He looked at Kenny through the mirror.

“You're kidding.”

Kenny shook his head. “And here I thought you liked Kyle. If I knew…”

He laughed. Stan turned around to him and reached out, grabbing his hand.

“I didn't know I liked you until tonight. I should've known, I'm so stupid,” Stan said.

Kenny pulled himself closer. “We're both dumbasses, dude. But we can make up for lost time, preferably while we're still home alone.”

Stan laughed. “Sure, we can do that.”

Kenny pressed himself against Stan, and Stan held him tightly. This was totally worth making an ass out of himself for.

**Author's Note:**

> It begins asdfgh 7 days of me dumping my crap onto AO3. Sorry guys.
> 
> Anyway, come check out my [Tumblr!](http://vehicroids.tumblr.com)


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